It's Wright's Fault
by ChloboShoka
Summary: For the Kink Meme. It's Wendy Oldbag's funeral but Phoenix can't help but laugh and Edgeworth and Gumshoe end up joining in.


Title: It's Wright's Fault

Rating: T

Pairings: Phoenix/Edgeworth & Maya/Franziska

Notes: The Kink meme prompt was Oldbag's funeral. Those who've seen this in the kink meme might have noticed I've changed things.

Disclaimer: Characters are copyright to capcom apart from Reverand Goldfuck and Ijizzin Mipants.

It's Wright's Fault

_"Man will this woman ever die?" Phoenix thought out._

Three weeks after saying this him, the rest of his colleges, and some of Wendy Oldbag's friends were sitting in the church paying their respects to Wendy Oldbag. She had passed away after he said those words. He was surprised that she had any.

"Miss Oldbag's sudden passing came as a dreadful shock to us all," Reverend Goldfuck said. "Most of you would have known her as the quirky security guard we all knew and loved. She was a kind woman who was dedicated to her job at hand. Always had something to say, no matter who you are she was willing to have conversation with you. For instance I remember the time she gave me free coffee and donuts. We will never forget how much she has contributed to Los Angeles. If she was still alive, today would have been the day she married Ijizzin Mipants."

Phoenix chuckled, aiming to be a quiet as he could.

"Hey Pal its mean to laugh at a funeral," Gumshoe whispered to Phoenix. It was too late he couldn't help but laugh because of their names. He couldn't help it; they were funny. Reverend Goldfuck was ironically amusing, since he had a swear word in his surname and yet he was working in a church. Phoenix didn't mean to be racist, but Ijizzin Mipants was a name that made him laugh. Then Edgeworth started to get the giggles too.

"Not you too pal," Gumshoe moaned at Edgeworth.

"It's Wright's fault!" Edgeworth muttered, who tried to keep his laughter in.

"Admit it, his name sounds like _I jizzed in my pants,_" Phoenix said.

"Don't get me started," Gumshoe whispered.

"You fools," Franziska snapped quietly. "Shut up!"

"She's really was an old bag," chuckled Phoenix. He tapped the shoulder of the spirit medium next to him. "Maya tell Franziska you love her, for my entertainment."

"Ding dong the bells begin to chime," Pearl was singing as she looked around in the big church. Pearl had lived a sheltered life and had never seen a building so ancient and large before. Understandably, she had no idea how to behave at a funeral although she was doing better than Phoenix.

"Shh Pearl," Maya told her. "Don't sing yet. Oh and Miss Von Karma..." Maya slightly blushed as Franziska gave a cold stare. "I love you." Both Franziska and Maya blushed at the same time. Now Gumshoe looked bizarre trying to maintain his laughter.

"High-five Maya!" Phoenix chuckled.

"Okay, let's just listen to Mipants now." Edgeworth suggested.

"I'd love to listen your pants," Phoenix said whilst he smirked with his arms crossed. He then winked at Miles Edgeworth.

At this point, Gumshoe could not control his laughter. He sat on his chair with a big grin and erupted with laughter like a vicious volcano's eruption. Everyone turned to look at Detective Dick Gumshoe who was now a laughing machine. Not even Franziska's whips were enough to stop his laughter.

"Miss Von Karma no whipping in my church please," Reverend Goldfuck gasped although it was useless.

"YOU ARE ALL RACIST!" Ijizzin Mipants cried out. Tears sparkled on his dark skin and gray beard. "I should have made sure her funeral was in Pakistan!"

"This is your fault Wright," Edgeworth whispered to Phoenix who then chuckled. Phoenix then kissed him and by witnessing the kiss, Reverend Goldfuck fainted.

"WHIPPERSNAPPERS!" belowed a voice of an old lady. It was Wendy Oldbag's voice. She was wearing Pearl's clothes and had her hair shped as the top half of a heart – like how Pearl has her hair too. Pearl had channeled Oldbag's spirit for no good reason. They were suddenly frightened.

Phoenix, Edgeworth and Gumshoe were doomed.


End file.
